A lot happened in my life that was unpleasant. Some of it was traumatic and caused me lasting harm. I don’t know why it’s happening now, but the emotions surrounding some core issues are surfacing for me.
I was able to get an extra session with my therapist, and he helped enormously. He reminded me the pain is in the past. I’m OK right now. I repeat I’m OK right now. Writing that helped me just now, too.
I’m grieving the pain from the past. It hurts now, but the grief will end. I know it will end.
The immediate manifestation of all this emotion is a strong desire to call my ex. He’s my ex for a reason, and calling him would only lead to heartache, but that doesn’t change the desire. It’s really strong.
Meditation helps. Therapy helped. I’ve been using medication as prescribed. It was pouring rain this morning, so no walk. I didn’t sleep enough last night, and that’s a problem. My diet is normal. I’m doing the things I need to to stay well.
I’m OK right now. And that’s all I’ve got.